Does Daycare Affect Attachment? (What Research Says)

As kids start to spend more and more time in daycare, a question irritates parents, does daycare affect attachment? Will my children get distant from me and get more attached to their childcare provider? 

A quick answer is maybe. Your child can be more attached to the care provider than you. But the reason isn’t daycare at all.  

Kids don’t get distant from their parents no matter how close they are to someone else. Want to know the real cause of attachment issues and how you can prevent it? Then, continue scrolling.

A General Concept of Attachment

Here’s a rule of thumb about children’s attachment. 

Children are close to those who care for them, show them love and give them attention. Parents (especially mothers) do that, and that’s why children are attached to their parents the most. 

Other than that, they can have a good bond with their grandparents or someone in your friends and family. And if you observe, you’ll notice it’s because they give love and attention to children in the first place. 

So besides parents, children connect with those who give them attention and love. 

Does Daycare Cause Attachment Issues? 

The shortest answer is no.

Research done by PubMed Central (PMC) and Encylopedia on Early Childhood Development clearly show that there’s no relation between daycare and child attachment issues.

“No relation exists between daycare and attachment.” Encylopedia on Early Childhood Development

Researchers have also seen that daycare children are more social than home-cared kids. And it makes sense as kids at daycare get more social experience. 

“But how can you say that? I’ve seen daycare kids getting distant from their parents.”

There’s no denying that there are examples of children getting detached from their parents. However, the reason isn’t daycare at all. Let’s deeply understand the real cause of attachment issues in kids.

Psychology of Daycare and Attachment Issues

Why Do Children Get Distant From Their Parents? 

Let’s first make this clear. Children can have a fantastic bond with their caregivers or family members while having a perfect and healthy relationship with their parents. It’s not This or That situation. So, if your kid shares a bond with a caregiver, it doesn’t mean they’re getting distant from you.

So why can a kid have attachment issues with their parents? Here’s the answer.

Parents are a child’s first caregivers and share a special bond that no one can replace. Children expect their parents to give them attention and love and want their time. 

But when a parent isn’t able to give time to their children, they try to find that comfort and care somewhere else. They develop a strong bond with those who care for them and spend time with them. They can be daycare teachers or someone in your friends and family. 

So children become distant from their parents not because of daycare but because they don’t get the love and care from their parents. In the case of daycare kids, they often find that love and affection in their childcare provider, so it looks like the daycare is the reason behind their attachment issues.

In cases where kids lose their bond with their parents, consider looking at the parent’s attitude towards their children. You’ll find they’re not giving proper attention to their kids.  

The Mother’s Insecurity: What if My Kid Has a Stronger Bond With Caregiver

Mothers often have this insecurity that their kids will be more attached to caregivers than them because childcare providers are doing their job. But if you have a good bond with your child, you shouldn’t worry about it. 

This isn’t a competition. Your child can be close to you and their caregiver simultaneously just like they can bond well with someone in the family. You won’t be insecure in this case, and so you shouldn’t be in the former one. 

Kids have an exceptional bond with their parents, and any other bond cannot replace it unless the parents aren’t playing their part.

Interestingly, children who’re close to their parents easily get comfortable with other caregivers as well. And this doesn’t affect your bond with your child at all.

Do Increasing Daycare Hours Affect Attachment?

If your child is in daycare for 7 to 12 hours a day, there’s a chance of disorganized attachment. It’s crucial at this stage to dedicate a few hours to your child and make things consistent. Spend weekends with them and give them the time, love and attention they want from you. 

How much daycare is too much? Know the optimum duration and the side effects of surpassing it.

Long-Term Impact of Daycare Environment on Kid’s Attachment

“At age 15 months (but not 36 months) infants were more likely to exhibit insecure attachment with their mothers when relatively insensitive maternal care was coupled with relatively insensitive child care (dual risk).” PubMed Central (PMC)

Data shows that the care quality affects the child in the long run. It can cause insecure attachment and can affect their behavior and confidence in adolescence. But this situation worsens if the child isn’t receiving proper maternal care.

Think about it. A kid who’s not getting proper care and attention from the caregiver and the mother will definitely be affected. So, as a parent, it’s your duty to ensure your kid is getting quality care in the daycare and that you’re playing your part in your kid’s life.

How to Fix Attachment Issues and Make Sure Your Child Doesn’t Lose Their Bond With You?

Whether you’re feeling your bond is weakening or want to prevent it from wearing out, there’s only one solution. Give love, time and attention to your child and make it consistent. 

• Listen to them and ask them how was their day 
• Play with them and do activities together
• Spend weekends together
• If possible, consider working part-time, so your child can get more time with you 

Spending time with your child and making them feel your affection is the only way to revive and strengthen your bond. 

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What Is the Root Cause of Attachment Issues?

Parents’ behavior and attitude toward their kids is the root cause of all attachment issues. If kids receive proper care and affection from their parents, they won’t have any attachment issues. However, if a child wants to share their day and parents don’t have time to listen, this behavior is what weakens the bond. 

2. How Do You Fix Attachment Issues in Toddlers?

If your toddler is having attachment issues, it means they need more of your time. They’re looking for your love and care. So consider spending more time with your little ones. 

Conclusion

So this was all that research and data say about daycare affecting attachment.

Parents, especially mothers, need to understand that no one else can take their place unless they leave their space in their kid’s life. 

Also, increasing attachment with a caregiver or with any other person doesn’t mean your child is getting distant from you. These attachments don’t compete; they work together as long as everyone fulfills their duties. 

So send your kind to daycare worry-free. They’ll not lose that special bond with you.